Thursday, September 30, 2010

What do you do when...

you want to play "Ants in the Pants", open the box and find one blue ant?
No pants mind you, just the ant.
We played 4 hands of UNO and I was soundly tromped by the 5yr old each time.

Oh, and here's a picture of what I've been busy doing the past week. I am quite proud of my own damn self.

Maybe now I can get some work done.
Or make more preserves...

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

I'm kinda busy at the moment so that's if for today.

Friday, September 17, 2010


Cigarettes and snow.
Matches flaring.
Long hair drifts across my face.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


I think I'm gonna like the movie.
We need to have a bathroom upstairs.
I made pear preserves just like my MawMaw made.

Guess which one I'm going to tell you all about today?

Up until yesterday no one had been able to duplicate her recipe and though I probably still haven't gotten it just right, it's the closest any of us have come in the 15 years since my Mom's mother's mother died.
So, you might be asking, why not just find a pear recipe and make it-preserves can't be that hard can they?
We've all tried and-trust me-nothing has been even close. The mystique has only grown with time and our memories have waxed nostalgic with remembered flavors and textures.

Now, my brain is the kind that likes to puzzle things out waaaay in the background while I'm doing other stuff and then surprises me with EUREKA! at the strangest times. Add in my love of cooking and you can figure the rest of the story.
3 0'clock in the morning, about 4 years after seriously talking about these preserves with my Mom, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins at a family gathering, I woke up and just knew what MawMaw's secret was and what to do to recreate her pear preserves.

What was her secret?

Don't worry, I'll share.


MawMaw didn't make pear preserves, she made quince preserves.
Quince and pears look alike but believe you me they aren't the same.
How do you find quince?
Good luck at the grocery.
What you really need to do is find someone who has an old pear tree in their backyard and knock on their door and ask them if you could have a few pears.
They will tell you that those pears aren't ever any good, they never get soft or sweet and they aren't sure why they haven't just cut the pesky no good tree down yet.
You my friend have just struck gold.
Way back in olden days many people planted a quince tree so that they could put up preserves and chutneys with the fruit which is extremely hardy and relatively pest free-unlike a sweet soft pear. Now this tree planting took place sooooo long ago and so few people these days know anything anymore about the days before jams, jellies and sweets were found at the grocery-the days when many people put up their own food, stocking up the Winter pantry with Summer's bounty-that the current owners of home and tree are clueless about the delights to be found in their own backyard.
Which brings us back to the neighbor...
Ask them if you can pick a bag or so, or even just get all the windfall up off the ground for them (since you're planning on canning them a little bruising doesn't hurt) so...
Chances are good that they will agree and somehow think they are getting the better part of the deal.

Win Win!

Hopefully you now have about 3 pounds of hard bitter fruit.
What to do, what to do?
Let the quince sit on the counter for a day or two-it won't hurt a thing. Eventually you'll decide you need that counter space for something and be ready to get to work.
Get a sharp little knife and start peeling and slicing those hard buggers. Let me share the proper technique. Peel the skin with small firm movements of the wrist towards yourself, bracing the quince with your opposite hand and cutting hand thumb. When the peel is gone continue the peeling motion around the fruit cutting thin slices off as you go and discarding any bruised flesh. The slices you cut should be no more than a quarter inch thick, thinner if you can manage it. Don't worry about coring the fruit as you'll know when you can't get any more good stuff off, most quince have a significantly hard grainy center-believe me. Do the slicing as you peel, over a bowl to catch the surprising amount of juice that is released. Don't worry about the quince turning brown, it's supposed to! Okay okay, the preserves are supposed to end up dark if you want it to be like MawMaw's-you do want it to be like hers don't you? Keep peeling and slicing until you end up with about 2 1/2-2 3/4 pounds of prepared fruit.
Here comes the hard part...
Dump the fruit into a big dutch oven type pot and dump over the top about 2 cups of sugar and oh, maybe a half cup of water, stir and bring to a low simmer.
Keep simmering the fruit over lowish heat until it is transparent and a dark pinkish golden brown. The "juice" should be almost honey like in consistency and there won't be a ton of it (this step takes forever but don't give into the temptation to turn up the heat). Give it a taste and if it's too sweet for you add in a teaspoon or more of lemon juice, on second thought the little bit of acidity is nice so why don't you go ahead and add the lemon juice anyway.
In the meantime you have by now realized that you don't have enough jars so you have made a quick run to the store for more, cajoled someone-in this case Big Daddy D-to unload the dishwasher, and then loaded the dishwasher up with the new jars, lids, and bands and run the dishwasher on its STERILIZE setting* and are just waiting for everything to be ready.
Which could take a few hours I'll be honest. Those quince are something else but worth it.
Really truly!
Okay, the fruit is finally done, transparent and glossy like stained glass and your jars are sterile.
Time to fill 'em up!
Place your jars on a clean dish towel next to the stove/pot but leave the lids and bands in the hot steamy dishwasher.
Spoon the hot quince into the hot jars, leaving about 1/4-1/2 inch clearance at the top and when the fruit is gone pour any juice left over the fruit-use your best judgement about which jar needs what. Place the hot lids on the still hot jars, put the bands on and just hand tighten them-don't go all crazy with that, you might break something-namely the jar and that would suck because you have worked so damn hard to get to this point and there is NO SALVAGING when broken glass is involved.
Where were we?
If you know you'll be eating these preserves up within a couple of months* then just turn the jars over on your dishtowel and listen for the eventual *POP* as the seal is made, let the jars cool down completely(this could take a day so be prepared) then turn them back over and check that the proper seal has been made and store them in a cool dark cupboard. If the seal hasn't been made you have a couple of choices. The first is to just put the jars that didn't seal into the fridge and eat them all up in a couple of weeks. The second option is to put the jars(with the lid and band still on)(I figure you probably already knew that but it almost never hurts to say stuff like that again) into a deep pot and cover with at least an inch of water and then bring it all to a boil and continue to process the preserves for about 15-20 minutes. Carefully lift the hot jars from the water and set aside to cool down. You should hear the *POP* this time for sure.
If you don't hear the *POP* this time then your preserves are letting you know that it is time to make some biscuits and get the butter out.
Which is of course the best way to enjoy MAWMAW'S PEAR PRESERVES! Some sausage links would be tasty too.

Makes about 40 ounces of preserves. I ended up with 10 4oz jars this time and I'll try for that much again next time.

After reading this convoluted "recipe/technique" you are probably no longer wondering why MawMaw's preserves have been a mystery for the past 70 years. I am a sucker for this stuff though and have to spread the love that comes from recreating old memories and making new ones.

*If your dishwasher doesn't have a sterilize setting or you don't have a dishwasher at all, just boil the heck out of your jars, lids and bands.
*Oh, do the hot water processing anyway if you are making enough preserves to last for months and months and months-I probably should have mentioned that earlier...

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Banana Muffins Redux

I know I already posted this recipe but I made these yesterday and the story changed.

Banana Nut Muffins

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

In a 4 cup measuring cup/bowl(what do you call those things?)(mine are Pyrex which I love)

Mash enough bananas to make 1 1/2 cups(kids and potato mashers go well together for this step)
2 large eggs(again with the Kid action)
2/3 cup sugar(Kid loves mixing so let her work and give her plenty of room)
1/2 cup vegetable oil(exchange potato masher for a whisk and get ready to wipe down the counters)(the Kid is ecstatic that she has been trusted with a mighty whisk)(she'll keep this up until you tell her to stop)

In a medium large bowl combine:

2 cups all purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt(1/4 tsp if using regular table salt)
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon fresh grated nutmeg
1 cup coarsely chopped walnuts(totally optional but I find banana bread without walnuts to be just plain weird)(the Big Girl has changed her mind about nuts)(No I have no idea why).

Stir the wet into the dry until just combined(Kid takes off at this point when you won't let her eat the batter).

Set aside the bowl while you hunt through the cabinets for your muffin tins. Which are all the way at the back. Under other pans. Clang about-it releases frustrations quite admirably. Yes, you should have everything together before you start but some days one must fly by the seat of ones pants and just dive in-these could have easily turned into pancakes by stirring in some milk so, hey, no big deal.

The batter should be well rested by now so anoint those darn tins with your favorite non-stick cooking spray and get on with the filling!

Use a tablespoon to not quite fill the mini muffin tins.
Use an ice cream scoop to 2/3 fill the larger muffin tins.
It should work out perfect if, like me, you prefer orderly muffins. If you like giant ones or want them to rise up and spill over and get a crusty little edge I simply don't know how many muffins you can make.

Put your tins in the oven and bake the minis for about 12 minutes.
Leave the bigger ones in for another 5-8 minutes(total time for large muffins 17-20 minutes).
If you make a loaf let it bake for about an hour.
FORGET THE LOAF!!!!!!!!!!!!
Muffins are faster and you can eat them right out of the oven smeared with butter!

When they are cooled-and if you have any left-just bag those suckers up and put them in the freezer. 15-30 seconds in the microwave and you have breakfast or a snack rarin' to go!


At first glance I thought this was an ad for Gucci panties and thought WTF?
I think they designed this to look like panties and subliminally entice you to buy the sexy purse.
Or maybe the designer drew it up and liked it without even realizing the reason it was so eye-catching was because the bag looks like sexy burlesque panties.
Oh well.
I'd never buy the purse but some uber hot granny panties wouldn't be amiss in my lingerie drawer.

Now for the real news.

I am sad.
I am angry.
It's everything.
It's nothing.

I'm going to make some more bread.
Baking seemed to help yesterday.