Friday, August 28, 2009

This life ain't no fairy tale

What you are about to read is a true story.
The names of those involved have not been changed.
The location: my yard
The time: last night
The characters: Me, Big Daddy D, a frog and perhaps Reepacheep

Last night as Big Daddy and I were lying in bed, waiting for sleep to draw the curtains on the day I heard it. Right under our bedroom window, the chirruping, rhythmic call of a frog ready to procreate.
After commenting on how charming the frog sounded I slipped into sleep.
Some time in the wee hours of the morning(3:28 if you really must know) I was pulled from a slumber that for once this week was untroubled by bloody vampire dreams. What was it? My sleep fogged mind could not process the sound. Is it the "smoke" detector? Is the gas stove on, bleeding particles into the air? As I stumbled through the house looking for the source of the metallic chirping I realized the sound was only in our room. A brief stop by the window confirmed my dawning suspicion that the culprit of my wakefulness was the lonely sound of that frog calling out for a mate, his song greatly diminished over the hours(count them, 5)of unsuccessful broadcasting.
I lay there, fortunately not long(final clock check 3:42 cause I know you want to know), listening and wishing for silence, and as I once again drifted into dreamland his mournful tune stuttered to a halt.
Relating my tale of yet another wakeful night to Big Daddy I was, as usual, mildly perturbed by his assertions that he at least had not suffered the froggy serenade and had had a peaceful night's sleep.
Later, just moments after morning goodbyes Big Daddy D comes back in and says,
"You're not the only one who got tired of that frog-it's in the driveway and something pulled it's leg off"
"You're shitting me?!?!"
I run outside to look-barefoot in the cool drizzly rain-and sure enough there is Mr. Frog, belly up with one front foot and the opposite back foot chewed off, dead as Mr. Kennedy, lying in state behind the mustang.
"Yikes! Don't run over him, don't pop him! You have to get him off the driveway! Throw him in the grass or something!" (I'm such a girl sometimes)
I suspect Reepacheep, in doing one of the weird things that cats do, read my mind and got rid of my pesky suitor.
I mean, I wasn't gonna kiss that frog.
This life ain't no fuckin' fairy tale.


Huff Daddy said...

Ah cats!!! Rated #1 on Animal Planet as the most vicious animal in the world. The house cat is the only animal that kills merely for fun and sport.

Brook said...

HD-or to let his "Momma" sleep...We had a cat several years ago that was crying for food on the front porch, Big Daddy looked at him and said "You're an outside cat-go catch your own food!" Prince IMMEDIATELY sauntered across the street, crouched for a few seconds and leaped into the bushes, reappearing after some rustling about with a bird clamped in his jaws. He brought it back across the street, played with it a bit and then ate it while we watched. I think he had fun. He was the cat who killed all the moles in our yard-he didn't eat them though-just left them on the steps for us to find. Visious indeed! Yet the barn cat in Florida did not mess with the bantam chicks in the stall at all. Weird.

Nej said...

I love cats! Ours will bring all kinds of dead animals and leave them in front of the front some sort of offering. I used to wonder what they thought of us, when we just removed it from the area by throwing it into the yard? Was it a trade, a thank you for years of feeding them Tender Vittles (do they still make that stuff?) ?? Luckily our cats are inside cats now, or I'd be forced to take the dead rodents and dispose of them where the cats couldn't see. :-)

Brook said...

Nej-I think cats leave us "gifts" to show us what real food is-not the crap that comes out of a bag or can(which I happily provide for my cat(s)btw) or bring us good eats like they do for kittens. After all cats do have a very high opinion of themselves. And why don't they make mouse flavor food for cats? Or do they? And if they do-who taste tested it for just the right nuance? Things to ponder on this too long Friday.

WanderingGirl said...

Oh Reepacheep, not the frogs! Don't teach Blue, okay? Oh, Blue's going to be inside, so just keep the frogs outside, okay buddy?

Victoria said...

You definitely have some animal kingdom things going on around you these days wow!

I always like to think of my kittens (they're actually cats) as being so-very-how-you-say.. darling, sweet, more *animated* teddy bear-like creatures (miggies)- but all they want is to do is hunt (and it's always so shocking).

This is a great and sad all too real story of a frog..

PS how wonderful about your exchange student!

My little princess killed this mouse?!!

Dark Cloud Nine said...

poor froggy :( I hope he got laid before the cat got to him.

Spellbound said...

I'm with you Dark Cloud but that's how my mind works. Those of you who have been to the house know that we live close to nature and in the fall even inside cats often find that that nature comes to them. We have never seen or heard a live moue but the little gray cat left one in my daughter's bed when she was in high school. She's a tough girl. She did not scream or panic. She told little kitty what a good cat it was and picked up the mouse with a paper towel and get this, she pretended to take a bite and then thanked the cat. Like I told you, she's better than me.

Brook said...

WG-Reepacheep is a mighty hunter it seems, Blue seems to prefer backpacks and Opal to frogs(for attack purposes I mean). More on that eventually!

Victoria-I know! The chicks have been adopted by a good family thank goodness! It's hard to believe the fluffy lovies in our lives are actually quite efficient hunters-especially as they cuddle up and purr. Our exchange student has arrived and things are going well so far.Exciting and exhausting all rolled into one. More about that eventually too.

DCN-one can only sad to die wanting. I know maybe he was so tired and caught up in the afterglow that he didn't have the energy to escape the cat's clutches!

Spellbound-Having grown up with cats and dogs I have had my fair share of rodent gifts. The worst ever were the "gifts" of mouseburger and garter snakeburger left right exactly where your foot lands going out the front door. YUCK! No amount of country takes the icky out of those!